WB Rants: I Am Going To Die Soon

The World Health Organization has decided that happiness is bad for my health, and they announced it yesterday.

I love my food. I love meat. Beef. Burgers. Steaks. Bacon. The more the better. Protein, yo.

So imagine me going through the five stages of grief yesterday when finding out that processed meat like bacon causes cancer.

Not only that. but red meat (beef, pork, veal and lamb) are "probably carcinogenic".

So you're saying "maybe" then on that? It's PROBABLY carcinogenic doesn't mean it definitely does anything, right?

Good grief, everything is bad for you. Eggs for example have gone back-and-forth between being good for you and bad for you since I was a teenager. remember when getting a high cholesterol count was the worst thing that food could do for you?

It gets worse. The WHO has also said that eating these meat products pose the same risk as smoking.

Oh, so that's how it's gonna be? This is going to backfire on the World Health Organization. They may not know it, but this will not lead to people eating less meat. It will, however, lead to more people smoking, since they figure they're screwed anyway, YOLO and all.

DO NOT start smoking just because of this! Smoking is still foul. The anti-smoking ads are still spot-on. Just keep on eatin'. This stuff will be good for you again soon.