It's definitely not tropical in the Cedar Valley today... to say the least. As of my witting this, it's -24 with the windchill. But that isn't stopping us from having some fun with these stupid cold temps, right? Well it shouldn't anyways!

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So without any further ado, enjoy these family friendly 'it's so cold' jokes:

  • It's so cold I had to break the smoke off my chimney.
  • It's so cold I had to open the refrigerator to heat the house.
  • It's so cold that Lady Liberty put her torch inside her dress!
  • It's so cold prisoners are begging for the electric chair.
  • It's so cold I saw one dog trying to jump start another one.
  • It's so cold, Iowa politicians have their hands in their own pockets.
  • It's so cold that roosters are rushing into KFC and begging to use the pressure cooker!
  • It's so cold pickpockets are calling in sick.
  • It's so cold a streaker froze in mid-streak!
  • It's so cold I chipped my tooth on my soup.
  • It's so cold Sidecar is serving coffee on a stick.
  • It's so cold we pulled everything out of the freezer and huddled inside to keep warm.
  • It's so cold, I saw an Amish guy buying an electric blanket.
  • It's so cold, I actually saw a gangsta pull his pants up.
  • It's so cold, ice cubes are coming out of my faucet.
  • It's so cold, I'm drinking hot sauce instead of coffee.
  • It's so cold, Jack Frost wants to warm up.
  • It's so cold I got brain freeze!
  • It's so cold I had to chisel my dog off a fire hydrant.
  • It's so cold trees are chopping themselves into firewood.
  • It's so cold, cops are tazing themselves.

 

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