CRAPPY NEWS – 4/24/17
A hunter's camouflage worked a bit too well, a man gets some strange medical advice, and a married guy goes to extremes to hide his secret life...
Crawford County, KS- The cliche of "the hunter becoming the hunted" turned into the real thing.
Kenneth Dienst was turkey hunting with his brother and a friend on April 12th...when he accidentally shot them both in the face! The three hunters were using turkey calls and a technique known as fanning, in which a fan of turkey feathers is used to attract or sneak up on the birds.
Dienst saw the fans and mistook both of his hunting partners for LIVE turkeys. Both of the victims sustained minor injuries. A spokesman for the National Wild Turkey Federation (?) said “hunting is supposed to be fun, not something where you get hurt or maimed.” [Kansas City Star]
Guangzhou, China- A man sought an interesting cure for his tummy troubles.
The man was having some serious constipation issues last week. The problem was so bad that he resorted to a folk remedy he'd read about in a local newspaper--he shoved a LIVE EEL in his rectum! Shockingly, this didn't work and he was forced to go to the hospital.
Doctors say the eel, which had a head the size of a ping-pong ball, burrowed through the man's intestines and nearly killed him. [South China Morning Post]
It doesn't take a medical degree to know that this was probably a horrible idea.
Hyderabad, India- Another case of the cover-up being WAY worse than the actual lie.
32-year-old Motaparthi Vamshi Krishna is married...but he also had an online girlfriend about 400 miles away who didn't know about his wife. The mistress had been pressuring him to meet in person, so he came up with a plan to get off the hook.
Krishna forged a plane ticket for her. And then, right before her flight last Saturday, he emailed a BOMB HOAX to the airport and her "flight" was canceled. Of course, police were able to trace the IP address back to him and now Krishna faces up to FIVE YEARS in prison! Adding to the embarrassment, the wife and the girlfriend found out about each other. [CNN]
Now, he's probably wishing that the bomb threat was real...and that he was on the flight.