CRAPPY NEWS – 6/29/17
Another fast-food freakout, a fidget spinner swindler, and a bronzed beefcake beatdown...
Daytona Beach, FL- Three customers attacked a McDonald's employee over a broken ice cream machine.
The incident happened Sunday night when the drive-thru cashier told the three women the ice cream machine was down for maintenance. The customers then went inside and flipped when they saw somebody else EATING ice cream. They claimed the employee lied to them...so they hopped the counter and assaulted her.
A manager called 911, but the suspects left before cops got there. Security cameras got video of their car, so police should be able to find them. [ClickOrlando.com]
EVERYBODY knows that McDonald's ice cream machines break down all the time. I mean, I love a McFlurry as much as anybody, but I've never felt the urge to commit felony for one...
Bellevue, NE- Don't tell this woman that the fidget spinner craze is past its peak...
A 23-year-old was busted for shoplifting after Walmart employees caught her trying to walk out of the store with EIGHTEEN of them. Police suspect the woman was stockpiling the fidget spinners in an attempt to re-sell them at a higher price. Which is hilarious because they only cost about $5 apiece and you can get them pretty much ANYWHERE. [Omaha World-Herald]
Is there a fidget spinner black market that I'm unaware of? Apparently she thought so.
Rheinbach, Germany- A bodybuilding coach tried to kill a guy because of fake tanner...
The man was coaching his cousin and went to a "tanning expert" to get the right look. But during the competition the bronzer smeared when it mixed with his cousin's sweat, and the coach blamed the mishap for the loss.
He was so upset that he hid in some bushes outside the arena and SHOT the tanning guru in the stomach. He suffered damage to his liver and kidneys but survived.
The coach was in court last week and received a seven-year-sentence for attempted manslaughter. [Mirror]
I'm sure he'll have no problem finding someone to pump him while he's in jail...