If you're gonna steal some stuff...at least look festive while doing it. This is 'Crappy News' for Monday, November 20th.

Olympia, WA- A man had to be rescued after hurting himself...while pooping.

Hard toilet.
Gustavo Andrade

The victim was relieving himself early Thursday morning when he slipped and fell down a 20-foot embankment into a ravine.

The man’s hip was injured and he had to be lifted out using ropes attached to a fire truck ladder, which took about an hour and a half.

The victim was treated for non-life-threatening injuries. [The Olympian]

That's a pretty serious defecation situation.

Phoenix, AZ- A burglar left some very important information behind. More than once.


39-year-old Erin Sullivan had successfully pulled off several robberies in the Phoenix area, stealing more than $225,000 worth of items from multiple homes throughout the past month.

One of the homeowners reported $15,000 of jewelry and a handgun missing. Police investigating found a binder that didn't belong to the owner and inside of it...was Sullivan’s resume. Detectives found another burglary connected to Sullivan, in which  $200,000 in, jewelry, watches and luggage had been stolen. Officers also found Sullivan's cell phone inside the house.

Sullivan denied any wrongdoing, but cops searched his home and found many items matching the description of what was stolen, including luxury watches hidden in cereal boxes. [AZcentral.com]

I sincerely hope he didn't list "attention to detail" as one of his special skills.

The Villages, FL- A woman stole a bunch of stuff from a department store last week, and did while dressed as a TURKEY.


67-year-old Irene Leonhard was busted at a Belk store of Friday. Leonhard was seen carrying a blue mesh bag and small brown purse when she entered the store. She pulled a Michael Kors purse from a shelf and selected several other items, put them into her bag and left the store.

Believe it or not, the employees actually noticed the giant turkey stealing from them and they called the cops. Leonhard wound up with 11 items worth a total of $1,500 before being arrested for grand theft. [Villages-News.com]

I thought the idea behind Thanksgiving was to be thankful for things you ALREADY have. Oh, well. At least she was in the holiday spirit.

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