The jokes kind of write themselves, don't they? This is "Crappy News" for Tuesday, May 15th.

Lakeland, FL- A mom and her son were arrested...on Mother's Day.

Close-up. Arrested man handcuffed

54-year-old Judy Bryant and her 27-year-old son, Seth, were drinking Sunday night.

Seth got upset when his father tried to cut him off, so he put his fist against his dad's face and shoved him with it.

The father called 911, and when cops got there, Judy was so upset that her son was being arrested that she shoved her husband against a counter and asked, quote, "How's this for domestic violence?"

Judy was booked for misdemeanor battery, and Seth was charged with felony battery. [WFLA-TV]

Not quite the mother-son bonding experience I'd prefer...but, to each their own.

Philadelphia, PA- A fake DJ conned his way into three different high school functions.

District officials say Jerez Coleman, aka DJ Silent Assassin, posed as the DJ for singer Alicia Keys, and was even flanked by a pair of "bodyguards."

Dj mixes the track

After appearing at South Philadelphia High, Coleman was interviewed by a local radio station, then spoke to students at a performing arts school. He also showed up at a college signing day event that same week, which was hosted by Michelle Obama.

Coleman has a very controversial past. He spent nearly two years in prison for threatening to blow up the Washington, D.C. transit system. He then underwent a psychiatric evaluation, and later was featured on the MTV show Catfish, depicting himself as a successful rapper.

The school district has filed a complaint about Coleman; no arrests have been made. [ABC Philadelphia]

Seriously? I couldn't even show up at MY high school and do something like this.

Waterloo, IA- An Evansdale man was busted for trying to break into the POLICE STATION.

Waterloo Police
Waterloo Police

33-year-old Andrew M. Reagan came to the Waterloo Police Department with an assault victim Friday night. Officers say Reagan became annoyed with having to wait in the lobby and began tinkering with the door.

According to police, an officer tried to talk to Reagan through an intercom, but Reagan picked the lock on the door that separates the public waiting area from the front desk and walked inside. He was confronted, arrested and charged with second-degree burglary and possession of burglary tools. [The Courier]

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