Happy Hump Day! Here are today's headlines:

A Canadian man wishes he would've paid more attention to a made-up holiday, a veteran steals from OTHER veterans to feed a porn habit, and a scuffle leads to a man losing MUCH more than a parking space...

Guelph, Ontario, Canada- What started as police giving a friendly greeting turned into them chasing a suspect.


Cops noticed a man carrying a popcorn bucket down the street on Thursday and wished the guy a happy National Popcorn Day (which actually was Thursday).

I'm guessing the man was unaware of the holiday, because he panicked and began sprinting away, which aroused the police's suspicion.

The cops chased him down, and found $2,700 worth of drugs in his popcorn box.  He was arrested and charged with two counts of possession with intent to traffic. [CTV News]

Was there ACTUAL popcorn inside the box? If so, he should ALSO be arrested for "misdemeanor abuse of a tasty snack." :-)

Mansfield, CT- We don't agree on a lot of things, but most of us agree that you should definitely respect our veterans. This guy did NOT get the message.

72-year-old Frederick Brown was busted last year for embezzling from a VFW Post and American Legion Post. Frederick is a veteran who flew a B-52 bomber in Vietnam, and he was the treasurer at both places...which gave him sole access to the bank accounts  for several years.

Beauty hairstyle

Further investigation by post members revealed that Brown had opened a debit card on the post’s account and made about $143,000 in unauthorized purchases. Police determined that about $32,000 was spent on webcam pornography.

He pleaded guilty to first-degree and third-degree larceny in October, and he was just sentenced to two-and-a-half years in prison. [Journal Inquirer]

Minsk, Belarus- An argument over a parking space turned into an awful ordeal.

A 33-year-old man took a shovel to clear out a parking space for his wife's car.

car under the snow

When he went to return the snow shovel to the garage he saw another car had taken the space he'd JUST cleared. The other guy, a 55-year-old man, refused to move.

Well, a physical fight ensued and the first man threw the second man on the ground, then stomped on his head AND his groin. The injuries were so severe, doctors had to REMOVE the man's penis! The 33-year-old man faces up to 2 years in prison. [Daily Mail]

No parking space is worth that...but, seriously...TWO YEARS? I'm glad the U.S. legal system is a tad more sophisticated than that.

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