CRAPPY NEWS – 12/6/16
Here is your daily dose of dumb: A man's unsuccessful quest for pizza, a Packer fan's long cab ride, and a Walmart employee who REALLY hates her job.
Penfield, New York- A 53-year-old man tried to break into a pizza place around 4:00 A.M. on Friday by crawling in through their vents.
Richard Graham wound up getting stuck and started screaming for help. A clerk at an adjoining 24-hour convenience store heard Graham screaming, so he called the cops.
The fire department had to come pull him out, and then they took him to the hospital with minor injuries. Once Graham was discharged, the cops immediately arrested him for burglary and criminal mischief. Even worse...he didn't get any money. Or pizza. (TWC News)
Richfield, Wisconsin- 24-year-old Nathan Meleski went to a Green Bay Packers game on Sunday, got drunk, became separated from his friends, and lost his cell phone...so he took a cab 111 miles home.
When they got there, Meleski told the cab driver to stop at an ATM so he could cover the $475 fare...but instead of getting the cash, he slipped out and took off running.
The cab driver then called the cops, who noticed that Nathan had left a trail of FOOTPRINTS in the snow...so they followed it...and found him at a neighborhood bar. Meleski's next ride was free--in a patrol car. He was charged with defrauding a cab operator. (Journal Sentinel)
Prescott, Arizona- A woman was stopped by police before she carried out a plan to kill her co-workers and burn down the Walmart where she worked.
Officers arrested 24-year-old Ebonice Johnson after discovering her in the back of the store, with a .22-caliber rifle. Authorities say Johnson went home and fetched the rifle, a knife and a blowtorch. She dropped the knife outside in the dark, and couldn't figure out how to load the gun, so she attempted to burn down the store with the torch...but was unable to get a fire going.
Making matters worse, she had typed a note on her computer about her intentions to kill her co-workers. Johnson also texted family members telling them of her plans, according to police. (Arizona Republic)
Tune in Monday-Friday at 8:10 for more "Crappy News with Happy Music" :-P
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