It's good to see politicians holding themselves to higher standards. Oh...wait. This is 'Crappy News' for Monday, February 19th.

Dortmund, Germany- Police are on the hunt for a stalker...a pizza stalker.


Guido Grolle is an attorney who says he's been bombarded with more than 100 unwanted pizza deliveries to his office.

Grolle pressed harassment charges in January, but has no idea who's been sending him the anonymous pies.

Grolle has also recently received deliveries of sausage, sushi and Greek food. [New York Post]

A lawyer complaining about harassment? That's a tasty twist.

Augusta, GA- A woman has been arrested after trying to tear off her boyfriend's junk.

Braden Gunem - Thinkstock
Braden Gunem - Thinkstock

47-year-old Melinda Dillashaw got into an argument with her boyfriend last weekend. Apparently their house was covered in animal poop and he asked HER to clean it up. Dillashaw told cops that her boyfriend threw her on the floor and tried to choke her, and she grabbed and twisted his genitals in self-defense. He managed to get away and call 911.

The boyfriend was taken to the hospital for his intimate injuries. While on the way to the jail, Dillashaw allegedly told police "you're damn right I was going to rip his nuts off." She was charged with simple battery. [WFXG-TV]

Nothing "simple" about trying to neuter someone.

Ames, IA- A state representative has been dinged for drunken driving.

51-year-old Francis "Chip" Baltimore was stopped last month on suspicion of driving under the influence.


Representative Baltimore's blood alcohol concentration was .147--nearly twice the legal limit--and police also found a gun under the driver's seat of the car.

Baltimore pleaded guilty to charges of operating while intoxicated and possession of a dangerous weapon. He's been placed one year's probation for each charge, and must pay a series of fines. Baltimore is also subject to a substance abuse evaluation and completion of a drunk driving education course.

Baltimore, a Republican from Boone, was removed from his role as chairman of the House Judiciary committee but will retain his House seat . [KCRG-TV]

First of all, I'm SO glad this guy is representing Iowa. Secondly, "Chip Baltimore" sounds like a character from The Simpsons or Anchorman.

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