These fools should stick to watching action movies, not trying to reenact them. This is 'Crappy News' for Friday, February 23rd.

Southgate, MI- A family did NOT have it their way.

Richard Avery visited a Burger King with his 7-and 8-year-old stepsons on Sunday, and claims that an X-rated sex scene was being played on the dining room TV.

Burger King Beats Expectations With Rising Q2 Profits
Getty Images

Avery said he didn't realize what was being shown until one of the kids pointed it out. He looked at the screen and allegedly saw a man thrusting a woman while fondling her breasts.

Avery is considering suing, claiming that his son has ADHD and photographic memory, and he's concerned the images will manifest into behavioral issues.

"When they see a man or a woman, they see them with a shirt on," Avery said. "Now they know what's underneath that shirt. It's not up to Burger King when we have a sex talk with our kids." [Click On Detroit]

Walnut Ridge, AR- A deer gave himself a tour of a college dorm.

White-tailed deer posing in autumn

Security video shows the deer running through a residence hall at Williams Baptist College after crashing through a window. The deer then dashed down a hallway before eventually trapping itself in a bathroom.

School officials said a maintenance worker calmed the buck by throwing a blanket over its head. The animal was escorted outside, where wildlife officials examined the deer before releasing it back into the woods. No students were injured and the deer only suffered minor cuts and scratches. [UPI]

I think the school missed a golden opportunity to name a new mascot.

Woodbury, NJ- A teen accidentally shot himself during a robbery.

Brand X Pictures

19-year-old Branden Wentz and three friends plotted to rob an acquaintance on Tuesday. Wentz brought a gun with him, but the guy fought back, and Wentz shot himself in the hand when he tried to pistol-whip the victim.

The four suspects fled the scene but were arrested after a brief police chase. The victim and Wentz were each taken to the hospital.

He's facing charges for robbery, aggravated assault, weapons offenses, and making terroristic threats. The accomplices, 24-year-old Doug Henderson, 18-year-old Aleem Clark Jr., and 18-year-old Brianna Jimenez were arrested for conspiracy to commit robbery. []

This stuff always works better in movies. Probably because they're trained professionals and not a bunch of idiots.

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